Bribe Works for Eight Hours

Albany, NY - Four Consumer Reports Editors were arrested Wednesday morning after FBI agents hauled off 32 boxes of confidential papers which prosecutors believe will show a link between the magazine's current issue and a transfer of funds made last month from the Cayman Island accounts. One resistant writer was slain after throwing a pen at the SWAT Team Commander.

"That's the lengthiest sentence I've ever seen in copy," said Field Agent Douglas Sorensen in his unkept New York office, "it's pretty obvious that amateur bloggers aren't paid much, nor screened very well."

The comment offended staff, and so, you may expect some real turds to be hurled toward the authorities in coming days.
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